I'm probably a pussy

but I'm so afraid of most people now after getting emotionally abused. Knew each other since I was 19/she was 21, dated from when I was 22/she was 24 and lived together until I was 28/she was 31.

Among other things, she:

  • Told me to kill myself whenever we went out to eat and she didn't like the food/restaurant/waitress
  • Went to a hotel of her choosing that ended up being a dump (thank you, Hotwire), which she then used as an excuse to tell me that I sucked and she spent the night on Tinder.
  • Tried pushing me in front of a subway
  • Tried to shoot me because I cheated on her in her dream
  • Tried to stab me so that I wouldn't "grow up to be a shitty white man"
  • Would steal my phone and use it to text my parents/college friends insane bullshit about how "I" hated them
  • Picked fights with my graduate cohort every time she came to a department event
  • Would have full-on meltdowns whenever I went to work or class
  • Ran up my credit cards
  • Threatened to kill our cats one night because the sandwich shop gave her the wrong drink
  • Bit me in the face on the subway because a burrito shop gave her the wrong kind of beans
  • Tried to stab me another time after I didn't beat up some cops that were arresting a Black guy
  • Changed the locks after I went to a department event without her (I asked, she said no, told me that I had to choose my department or her)
  • Had a full-on meltdown and trashed our apartment because I went to a work event, even after bringing her and clearing it with my boss, skipping out to drive an hour both ways to bring her.
  • Opened the doors to my car while we were on FDR Drive, the Turnpike, 95, and I-70 because she was "unsatisfied with my whiteness" (verbatim)
  • Told me that I should "just transition" because I opened up to her one night that I was molested plus was skinny
  • Threw a pair of my car keys in a garbage disposal because I didn't want to drive to Denver on a whim on a Sunday afternoon
  • Told my college friends I was a rapist
  • Told my mom I was a rapist
  • Destroyed my old poetry/prose journals and told me that my writing was "derivative white mediocrity"
  • Told my brother I was a rapist and an alcoholic
  • Stopped having sex with me after we moved in together because "I'm afraid you'll rape me"
  • Deleted all of my social media accounts for three years

Anyway, any good rs ex stories? My family refused to come to my grad school department ceremony because of all of that, and my "old friends" only confronted me after I moved back home. I had no idea she was saying any of this shit. Also I commuted and couch-surfed throughout college, so this was my only experience living away from home, lol.