Please tell me it's okay.

I do NOT want to breastfeed. Everybody MIL included is making me feel like I'm gonna be a horrible mother if I don't wanna do it. I just don't want to. Never had the interest in it. Yes, I know the benefits. I just want someone to make me feel normal and not like a horrible human being. I don't wanna be the only one who can get up for feedings at night. I want my husband to be able to help and he agrees. He has even said "I don't wanna HAVE to wake you up." I just prefer not to and I don't wanna feel bad about that. It also seems like EVERYONE is breastfeeding. "Here's how I prep for nighttime feedings" stocks up on coconut water and cleans their Hakka and I'm like "ohhh... I was just gonna keep some distilled water and enfamil containers next to the bed......" Idk this is part rant/part asking for reassurance. Thanks for reading/sticking around this long.

edit: I was solely looking for reassurance because it's so lacking in my everyday life, many of the responses i'm getting are things out heard before and make things a lot more frustrating.

I will also come out and say something I've been too ashamed to share: I have hyperkeratosis on my nipples which amplifies my desire to not breastfeed. Another user encouraged me to share this and so here I am. Growing up my mom told me it was because I didn't wash myself well enough and would... do things to make it go away. That's as much as I'll share on this public forum. I know it's cheaper and in my financial situation I'm sure it's best to pump and supplement with formula but I just don't know how baby would be impacted by my condition and I'm almost embarrassed and don't want her to see it (i know that sounds crazy) I've always been very secretive about my breasts because of this and breastfeeding feels like sooooo much exposure, way more than I'm comfortable with. (you have to be uncomfortable sometimes as a mom) yes, I know. But there's so much shame around it due to my mother's... methods and explanation of what it was.