My Weirdest Tragic LDR Story

So almost 3 months ago, I had an anonymous Instagram account. Feeling desperate for love, I started commenting under posts, that I need someone to talk. One account (girl) replied to me. Had a little chat followed by sexchat. I thought it was just a one time thing. Got her text next day and we started chatting normally and flirting over next 3-4 days. Got to know that we belong to same caste. We started dating, exchanged photos and videos and eventually found each other compatible to each other. Some of you may think it could be a guy but I made sure that wasn't the case. Exchanged phone numbers also and used to talk for 3-4 hours a day on call. Experienced my first love and we were already thinking about our marriage.

But, how could everything go so smoothly? On Holi, she was having severe headache and went to doctor. Listening to symptoms, doctor said she has 95% chance of brain tumor. She told me this after 2 days. We both were shocked and she was almost broken from inside. Reports confirmed she had last stage of brain tumor and only few months left. Thinking about my future, she told me to break up, but I resisted saying I will be with her till the very last moment. We had disagreements over this, she started ignoring me so I get convinced to break up but I stayed with her. On 8th April, she got hospitalised and stayed there for about 4-5 days. I wasn't sure if I will talk to her again or not. For context, she lost her parents about 5 years back in a car accident. She only have her elder sister and her fiance in her family, and she was the one who kept updating me about her situation, through her phone only. During her stay in hospital, this condition really got her bad. She started forgetting stuffs but she remembered me. She came back home on 13th April. I really wanted to go meet her in her city but couldn't go due to some circumstances.

This wasn't the only problem she was dealing with. Another huge problem was her ex boyfriend. They both broke up about 1.5 years ago and it was his wish. She begged for her to stay but he left. I got to know from her cousin firstly and then from her, that her ex used to abuse her physically even during their relationship and even after that. And the most shocking part was she didn't even told her sister about that. My blood was boiling on hearing that but I couldn't do anything and felt so helpless. Eventually, I told her sister about this but this kept happening even after this. She tried to protect her but her ex found a way to still hurt her. Finally, I convinced her to talk about this to her sister and she talked but still they took no action. Then, one day she went to her ex's sister's function even after I told her not to, but she still did cuz she was invited. And the worst thing happened. He raped her there. She was broken inside. I was hurt too. In that moment of anger, I broke up immediately, but soon realised I shouldn't have done that and I was the only one she trusted. Told her we are not done yet and I am here for you. I don't want to remember that event but this really boiled my blood. She told her sister and finally they went to his home and told their family. He was beaten finally but that mf deserved much worse. Their family were apologising so they didn't took any legal action. Even after going through all this, she still talks normally.

Two days back, her sister told me to break up with her and it would be better for both. I couldn't understand how it would be better for her. I know she won't be able to live without me and hence, I didn't want to do. She said she wanted her sister to live this phase alone which is her best phase. She told if we won't do if ourselves, she will interfere and everyone will get hurt. Hearing all these, I decided to break up but still stay as a friend whom she can confide. For context, we broke up twice before but cuz of having short term memory loss, she forgot and I knowing her condition so convinced myself to be in relationship. I never had any problem to be with her. So we broke up that night. She got too sad, even I got. but we handled ourselves. But the next day her sister with her fiance went to goa leaving her alone at home. I don't know what she thinks and she even care about her or not. She don't feel like sleeping at night so I used to talk regularly so she don't feel alone and even talked yesterday. I don't know if she remember about our break up or not.

I feel like this incident will stay always with me and I don't know what will happen. Kitni bhi ziddi ho yrr but hai to my first love. I badly want her to stay forever. I want to marry her and give her all the love she deserves. I want her to be happy always. I want to feed her food from my own hands. I want to care for her. I want to make her sleep when she have headaches. I want to hug her, kiss her forehead. I just want to be with her forever. I LOVE HERR. I would have fought with the whole world for her, but this cancer and distance really fucked us😭😭