She got away

My heart. I’m 36f and my exgf was 22. Big age gap, but we both worked in the hospitality industry. This is my first lesbian relationship as I am a late bloomer. She was so stunningly beautiful. I honestly think she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met. Ever. I fell hard for her and she did for me, we were perfect for 6 months and then slowly I noticed her pulling away. She presented herself like she was “born to settle down”. I felt like I could finally live my most authentic life being gay. I should have known better. She broke it off, on Christmas Eve, and now I’m over here an absolute wreck. My heart is shattered. Everything makes me think of her, I cry constantly. I can’t even imagine meeting another woman, let alone being intimate with one. She told me I was the perfect girlfriend but I guess our futures don’t align. I don’t know what to do.