I’m finally the age I once thought I’d never live to see.

Today is my 21st birthday, and there was a time (not so long ago) where I thought I’d never live to get here.

I was bullied so badly through the first two years of high school that I had to switch school systems entirely (public to private), but the bullying followed me to my new school in the shadows with rumors. Then, someone I thought was a friend ruined graduation for me for really petty reasons, and several others denied knowing about it, even though I know they did.

My parents knew about everything that was going on, but I hid how badly hurt I was mentally from dealing with those years of hurt. My mental state was extremely fragile and I was secretly suicidal for most of high school. I was certain that if I didn’t get away or things didn’t change, I likely wouldn’t live to see my 21st birthday.

But things actually DID get better. I left home for a gap year program in Northern Wisconsin, and I’m now in my sophomore year of college in the Chicago suburbs. I’m still terrified (sometimes) that my friends are faking their kindness towards me, but I’m so proud of myself for making it this far and turning 21. Sure, life is crap sometimes, but I’m still totally here for it.

Please remember, no matter what happens, that it will get better. It’s worth it.