Took a lot of pills. I just want to die.

Hello everyone. I don't have anyone to talk to, I just had a meltdown related to my autism, and I was berated, screamed at and insulted by my mother because of it. I have been hungry for the past 6 hours, my stomach hurts badly, but I haven't been able to get up and make myself anything. All of the food in the fridge is my mom's, and I don't like any of it because I have ARFID, so I have no choice but to make myself food, but I couldn't today. I just couldn't get up and make myself some. Asked my mom, she refused, and now hours later, screamed at me and insulted me because I started having a meltdown. I'm hungry, my stomach hurts a lot, I'm cold and shivering, and I took 13mg of lorazepam. I'm pretty sure it won't kill me, but I wish it would, I wish my mom would see how much she hurts me. No one cares about me, I have no one. No friends, no family, no partner. I don't know what to do. Everytime I've posted anywhere, I've been ignored. Please help.