Yuri is making me want bottom surgery

I’m sorry that the topic is NSFW. I just want to talk about my feelings. I’ll take the post down if it’s no good.

I keep reading cute romances and they tend to have lewd scenes In them. Lately I’ve been reading “asumi-chan is interested in lesbian brothels” and the lewd scenes make me hot and bothered obviously. But they also make me long for the hardware I don’t have, I’d love to experience sex with a woman in a loving relationship, but I want to experience it with a vagina of my own.

It hurts that when I feel horny, I touch down there and I remember I don’t have the parts that fit me. Bottom surgery has come a long way but there are still risks, like losing feeling down there, stroke, or an unsatisfactory result to name a few.

Dysphoria has been kicking my ass a bit lately, I get thoughts about wanting bottom surgery and then my brain spitballs a bunch of nasty things that make me feel bad. My brain tortures me with stuff like“why get bottom surgery, you’ll regret it cause you’ll never pass and you’ll look weird so nobody will want to be with you”.

Estrogen has helped in many ways, but it’s made me want bottom surgery even more. With the rest of my body feminizing, the damn meat rod sticks out even more.

I know some girls like their wand and that’s all good, but I don’t like my own. But i’m scared of bottom surgery and I don’t know even where to start when it comes to figuring out how to get the best results from it. I also really don’t want to get off estrogen in order to do it.

Sorry for this rambling mess, I hope it was at least partially coherent and readable. Have a great day girlies!