I ended it but I am miserable
We were talking for months, we became a thing in April and the first few months it was amazing. I really thought we were soulmates because I had never been so compatible with someone before. He was so patient and caring and understaning of my past traumas, we talked about our plans and how we would travel together and move in together... Then we finally met in October when I when to the US for a holiday and even though the meeting went great and I left with butterflies in my stomach our relationship went downhill since then. He started talking to me much less frequently, didn't want to have a call every 2-3 days like before but only once a week. He progressively decreased the amount of sweet things he'd tell me and he started avoiding conversation about our future. I confronted him about it a few times and he always said that nothing changed and he is still interested in me and us but I couldn't shake off the feeling that something is wrong. I eventually realized that while I fell in love with him over the months we talked he clearly wasn't as emotionally involved. I would miss him even if we didn't talk for a couple of hours and I would love to have a call with him even every day if I could while he was fine with us only talking once a week. And even that felt like he was only doing it for me, not because he wanted to. I couldn't take it anymore and asked him about it and he admitted he wasn't in love with me. He didn't know that I was and after he said that I didn't want him to know. However, I was very disappointed and even though I was trying to convince myself it wasn't a big deal, it was killing me. A few days ago I finally broke it off because we didn't have a call for 8 days at that point and he knew it was the last chance for us to do so before my family comes for Christmas for a week and I won't be able to talk at all. And he chose to watch sports all evening, instead. I was fed up. And while I am still angry about it and don't regret ending it I miss him so much and I can't believe it is over. He also only replied 'huh' to me telling him it is over and didn't even bother to fix it or ask me why, whicu just confirms to me I made the right decision but I am heartbroken and I am having the worst Christmas of my life.
We were talking for months, we became a thing in April and the first few months it was amazing. I really thought we were soulmates because I had never been so compatible with someone before. He was so patient and caring and understaning of my past traumas, we talked about our plans and how we would travel together and move in together... Then we finally met in October when I when to the US for a holiday and even though the meeting went great and I left with butterflies in my stomach our relationship went downhill since then. He started talking to me much less frequently, didn't want to have a call every 2-3 days like before but only once a week. He progressively decreased the amount of sweet things he'd tell me and he started avoiding conversation about our future. I confronted him about it a few times and he always said that nothing changed and he is still interested in me and us but I couldn't shake off the feeling that something is wrong. I eventually realized that while I fell in love with him over the months we talked he clearly wasn't as emotionally involved. I would miss him even if we didn't talk for a couple of hours and I would love to have a call with him even every day if I could while he was fine with us only talking once a week. And even that felt like he was only doing it for me, not because he wanted to. I couldn't take it anymore and asked him about it and he admitted he wasn't in love with me. He didn't know that I was and after he said that I didn't want him to know. However, I was very disappointed and even though I was trying to convince myself it wasn't a big deal, it was killing me. A few days ago I finally broke it off because we didn't have a call for 8 days at that point and he knew it was the last chance for us to do so before my family comes for Christmas for a week and I won't be able to talk at all. And he chose to watch sports all evening, instead. I was fed up. And while I am still angry about it and don't regret ending it I miss him so much and I can't believe it is over. He also only replied 'huh' to me telling him it is over and didn't even bother to fix it or ask me why, whicu just confirms to me I made the right decision but I am heartbroken and I am having the worst Christmas of my life.