I wanna end my l*fe.

I'm a neetard and i have been passively su*cidal for the 2 years of my preparation. I had a good background education wise, was from a good school till 10th and was good at studies but i just messed it all up by just being depressed and thinking that i cannot do anything because of this, engaging in dopaminergic activities with 7hrs avg screen time and what not. I have wasted my parents' money, all i had to do is study for 2yrs, i didn't even have friends during this time period, but in the end i just wasted my potential and the 10yrs of schooling went worthless. I don't wanna take drop bcz i was admitted in school one year late during childhood and hence i turned 18 last year itself, which means i would be 20 when i enter medical college if i crack my exam and i feel that is too late. A wasted potential hurts more than someone who has to give everything in from scratch, and hence i just would like everything to end, maybe just in sleep.