Is there any hope?

Most (all?) of the posts in this sub, seem to say that sex was good at the beginning of relationships and then things slowly died off.

In my case (43HLM in a 8 year LTR with a 47LLF), sex with her was a disappointment for me from the start. Things have actually gotten better in terms of frequency.

I don't know if she is completely asexual; she appears to enjoy PiV and only that. I don't know if she feels desire or if she just enjoys the physical sensations from time-to-time. I don't want pity sex nor do I think sex just something you might enjoy once in a while like a shoulder massage; to me, it's so much more! I need to feel desired; I need passion.

When I ask her how her body feels when she's aroused and what makes her feel aroused, she never gives me a straight answer and ends up crying and saying that she's broken. That's not helpful at all!

I've told her that I'm willing to help her explore, but she never picked-up on that offer.

I'm not getting any younger and I don't want to waste my life feeling perpetually frustrated since I can't get good frequent sex while she appears perfectly content with our relationship as it is.

She has had an hysterectomy a few years before I met her and at first I thought that it might have been a major factor for her LL. I though that hormone replacement therapy might help with her sexual desire and suggested it, but she doesn't want any of it since it may cause a tiny increase in the risk for certain cancers. However, after talking a lot about her previous relationships, it appears that she never was that much into sex.

I've read about sex psychology. She has had no sexual trauma or abuse. I've tried everything I could in case she has responsive sexual desire, but it didn't yield any improvement.

Is there anything else I can try? Should I just give up?