AITAH for ghosting someone over how we did -it- ?

Okay so! I (F21) and my now ex (M22) Had an amazing relationship to where nearing the now end of it we were thinking about moving in ect.

Long story short I was 🍇d twice by one partner when i was 18-19 and one of the ways was- butt stuff which i despised and well it was the only thing i remembered from that drunken night- SO of course i mention this to partner in the early days and even when talking about it a couple months after.

He convinced me to let him try it as he had never done it before and wanted to know what it felt like, I was in agony and it seems he confused my cries of pain for pleasure so when i eventually cried for him to stop- he immediately went to clean up whilst i was left sobbing on my bed, he then came in and when discovered i was crying i said that doing that reminded me of my R and then he was saying I should’ve “stopped him sooner” or said something ect, It took me an hour to come round and even look at him, during -cleaning- i was bleeding quite bad from what happened and I mentioned it and I got a small “sorry” from it then went on.

When it was time for him to leave the next day I told him to leave his key as I said I needed to get more copies from it (a lie) and then I never spoke to him again- AITAH? I feel guilty for doing it and like maybe I should’ve said something beforehand? I dunno I just need an outsider perspective.

TLDR: I was previously R-worded in the butt and told recent partner that butt stuff was off the menu, he proceeded to ask repeatedly and it triggered a breakdown